operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize