is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
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