I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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