What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
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