Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Randomize
