i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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