Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
