dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
