Welp...herpes.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
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