she sounds like chewbacca in bed
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Damn victory sex feels great
Randomize
