It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize
