me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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