Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
What drink are we having for lunch?
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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