just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
