If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
