She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
