What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
