I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
