i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Man, jail baloney is awful.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
