It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
