Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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