i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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