butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
