i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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