remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
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