You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
