There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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