So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
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