whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
