We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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