I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
