that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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