omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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