you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
