i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
