She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize