im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
