What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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