So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
it's not cheating when I paid for it
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
