if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize