This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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