Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
