he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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