Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
