It's Friday. Sex?
im about as happy as oj after his trial
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Randomize
