dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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