Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
