Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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