everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
how drunk are you?
Several
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize
