K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize