Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
