yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
